Tuesday, February 2, 2010

Greens

I’m sorry, but I JUST HAVE TO RANT! It’s not that I’m ungrateful but there are, surprisingly, many consequences to this.

I know for these past few days my blog appears to vibrate too much negativity than one can handle, BUT I JUST HAVE TO RANT SOMEWHERE!!!

They didn’t email us. They didn’t notify each one of us. If ESP was part of the requirement, I was not informed of it. Do they think we have nothing better to do but to google their website and to accidentally stumble upon it (which happens to be what I did)? Or are they really too…’busy’ social-networking to realize that not ALL of us have them in our list? Or is it the weather? The work-away-from-work? The semi-vacation? WHAT EXACTLY???

We were not notified about the dateline. That’s the simple truth. We didn’t know. And shockingly, their cute little website/blog is not included in the small booklet they distributed earlier. We didn’t know. I mean, think about it. I have nothing to hide. But I didn’t know how. I didn’t want to appear informal. But I didn’t know it is actually acceptable. I asked, but I didn’t get a reply. I’m new for God’s sake. How was I supposed to know?

And the other question, what is the point of withholding? So that we’ll suffer? Not all of us have mummies and daddies that own a company back home. Not all of our parents send us away with greens alongside their prayers. Not all of us. Some of us really depend on you. And I’m not complaining, you have been generous, thank you so much. Alhamdulillah, it is sufficient to survive given how long they are supposed to last. But when come times like these, how are we suppose to pay rent? Books? Bills? Fine, starve us, but books?! (Okay, honestly, my real concern is rent since we’re supposed to have it every first week of the month or penalty will follow suit. Are we supposed to have an extra five hundred every time?)

I don’t splurge. Occasionally I do spend more than I should, yes. But what, once a month? How is this fair to people like me who try to save on every occasion that I could? When it runs out, I’m still here. I need to eat. I need a place to stay. If I, or any of my friends, were back in Malaysia, sure, a phone call and we could survive. But here? Some of my friends are already facing overdrafts!

I am aware that when people like me say things like that, they’ll lash out. “Ungrateful kids!” “Try being in our shoes and change the system if you’re so smart!” “What you know, you complain only.” I know, I know, who am I? I don’t know how the system works. Who says I can do a better job. But one thing they need to realize is, that’s why a week or two is tolerable. We didn’t complain early on, did we? We understand one hundred percent that sometimes there are things way out of our hands. There are things that nobody can do anything about, true. AND WE TOTALLY UNDERSTAND. But three weeks???

To answer my earlier question - who am I? - I’ll tell you right now. I am someone who is lucky that my parents had a couple extra buck to give me six months ago.

-C-

6 comments:

Rassyid said...

we Malaysians say, "tired already."

i don't know if this has anything to do with our new Your Excellency. sigh...

Zaim Salimun said...

i'm impressed by the kind of subtle language used here, what a camouflage of aggravation..still, the truth lies in your words. very self-evident.

elly said...

it had better be by friday. i've spent almost half of the money allocated for this month's rent on books cos texts are required asap. so messed that i'm holding out on rent, having to ask parents for cash to cover for that in the meantime! i do NOT want to do that! and being in the city, i'm sure it's a known fact that rent, cost of living, etc are all sky high! arrgh! almost 800 dollars for rent and utilities - american dollars. do a little bit of currency conversion - the figures are outrageous!

elly said...

and knowing that my parents are transferring $$$ ASAP not because that they are able to freely part with their hard-earned cash, but because, what else can they do, really? they don't want me to be kicked out of the apartment, that's for sure. they don't want me to start borrowing from friends, that's for sure. they don't want me to worry excessively about financial issues and instead focus on school - the main purpose of me being here - that's for sure. they don't want me to starve, that's for sure. they really don't have a choice. it was so uncomfortable just typing out that email asking them for money. it made me really, really sad.

ChEsZa said...

"they don't want me to worry excessively about financial issues and instead focus on school - the main purpose of me being here - that's for sure"

good one smells. if only i can make those people read this, since as far as i know, they haven't realized the true purpose they send us here in the first place.

Zaim Salimun said...

this post reappeared as expected.