Tuesday, August 26, 2008


I have been with him for only...seven months. Barely past the half year mark. But I think I have learned to understand him and his actions more. People say that when you spend a lot of time with a person, you'll slowly develop the person's personality. And I am not complaining.

What I'm trying to say is, I'm starting to understand his stand on politics. Regarding the whole drama of the recent by-election, I am actually very proud of myself. Seriously. I realized recently that when it comes to the big P, I have come to aspire to be like two persons - my boyfriend and my lecturer, Prof Borges. I know for a fact that both of them are very passionate about politics but they don't show it. When I say they don't show it it doesn't mean that they don't care. They are just being professional, being logical, unlike me. And that's what I strive to be now.

Almost all my teenage life people have said that I am too sensitive and that sometimes I got blinded by it. I used to deny it by objecting that when I am passionate about something, I put my whole heart into it. I didn't realize then that THAT's the problem. I only put my heart into it. What about the most important part - my head? It's sad that I'm only starting to see what others have been telling me for ages. I admit now that I used to be quite biased. I only read stories/news from one side. I have only one political leader on my "Chesza is a fan of..." on my Friendster page. How can I debate, fight, and be an effective political science major with this attitude?

Now I want to start doing what I should have done a long time ago. Don't get too attached. I should turn back to the old me, when I still wanted to become a psychologist. I never like politics back then especially political leaders. I never believe that there is a better one. Like Dr. Renuka said, "There is no such thing as a good politician." When I think of it this way, I see things much clearer. I don't mix anger and frustration with opposing political views anymore. Nowadays I don't even blame the ruling party for everything that's wrong in the country. The truth is, many things led to this mess and I don't want to point fingers anymore. They say that when you point a finger, there are three more fingers pointing back at you. Maybe they have their faults but so does the other party. It's just human nature: power makes people do all sorts of crazy things. And not one person can guarantee the opposing party won't turn the same way. Research have shown that sooner or later we always disapprove of the same leaders we voted into office. Why is that so?

I guess what I want right now is just a happy and healthy Malaysia. It's not much to ask for but nevertheless it is on my wish list for the coming National Day this Sunday :)




Anonymous said...

WAH BIG CHANGE IN SYAZA. kanak2 pintar lak smakin berminat dgn politik. as usual i'm liberal, i can accept anything as long my freedom is guaranteed. one more thing i concern is my scholarship...
(kanak2 pintar)

diana said...

go go malaysia!

truth is, i don't even wholeheartedly know which stand to take, sometimes i am influenced to pick a side, but most of the time i try not to pick any and like u said if i don't have the knowledge about it why should i go around speaking so extravagantly about it hahah. but i do know one thing, and that's the fact that i love my country to bits regardless of whatever patheticness and lameness it possesess!

malaysia ku bahagiax3333

diana said...


ah to hell with typing errors :P

beb mentoot said...

whoa. didnt think u'd admit that u're sensitive about the big P. a good change for a new sem, eyyy?

eliza said...

let's all hope and pray for a better malaysia :)

ChEsZa said...

haha bagus lah kalau saya menyedarkan kamu semua tentang kasih sayang yg perlu dicurahkan kepada negara ini. maka, di manakah post2 merdeka anda semua?? *wink2*

n yeah, it is a change i think. however, it is not a sudden change. i've been thinking about it. really wanna become an objective political analyst ;-)


eliza said...

tunggu lah the stroke of midnight nanti ye.


ChEsZa said...

alah lambat tol elly ni.