Friday, January 4, 2008


I have to agree with one of Elly’s entries tonight. The best gifts in life for me are God and Music. As long as I have both, I know I can survive. But this is not to the extreme as how it used to be in my childhood. I understand now that Music is just an art but the overwhelming feeling of calm that comes with it is a gift from God. I used to listen to music 24/7 as I thought I can’t live without it. How childish. Yes I can live without it. But right now, listening to each note as I play my guitar… Enjoying the many variations of plucking… Letting it reverberates my pulse… And putting two and two together to make up a piece of music… This is my own limbo. Not between life and death, but between chaos and peace. Life for me is always of ups and downs. How do I go from one state to the other? By playing the music in my heart. The song in my heart right now is called Letting Go. It is about understanding that letting go is the best for me even when there’s this F# note that’s kind of screaming, “You’re making a mistake by letting a friend go!”

*Taking a deep breath*

But I’m sick of sticking up for your faults. Once you’ve learned to appreciate a woman’s worth only then I’ll consider being your friend again. I know being a friend means not judging each other, but this is not some kind of preliminary judging, this is the kind of judging after seeing the real you… After seeing what you’re capable of doing – or not doing – to girls. The ‘you’ that even your best friend is disappointed with. Me? I’m just someone you don’t even feel worth mentioning to your best friend, so just imagine the disappointment.

I'm sick of this A minor surrounding my heart. I want to go back to playing the C note which I’ve always associate with happy feelings. My music, my heart beats.


p/s: It only takes you ONCE to take advantage of me and then you're OUT!

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